The Way I See It

The way I see it life is a journey not a destination. I think I have heard that a few times and over the years I have truly come to believe in it with my whole heart. As a child you have the foggy idea that life is a destination. It is where you will be when you "grow up" Am I right? I know I always thought that was it....making it to adulthood. Well, once I got there it smacked me in the face. It wasn't the end, it didn't all of a sudden stop, I was still moving on. The journey is what makes like absolutely beautiful. Every little thing we experience makes us who we are today. As you go through this journey do not take anything for granted. Jump in both feet first and dig deep to feel every little emotion and put each memory in your pocket for the rest of the journey. So over the years what have I learned? How do I see life? Let's just think about some things.

Do you remember the freedom of being a kid? Okay so we can't go back and change things from our childhood as that part of the journey is over but what we can do is remind ourselves that kids need to be kids. We can grow through our children. We should let him enjoy childhood instead of pushing them to grow up so quick. When your child crawls into bed with you at night don't rush them back to their bed. Cuddle them and enjoy that feeling because soon enough they will not want to be in your bed! Let them get dirty..quit worrying about washing their clothes or how nasty they look...they are KIDS. Let them make messes. It CAN be cleaned up. Tell them about life's journey and how they savor every minute. Teach them positively...I mean don't our kids grow up to act a lot like their parents? Teach them love and kindness and to always give their best effort. Don't teach them hatred and anger. Stop the yelling...I speak from experience here. Although this will be their journey it is a part of yours too! Enjoy them while they are little because little goes away oh so quickly.

Your child will grow into a teenager and young adult. I know you remember how hard those days were...I do. They sucked sometimes. The pressure to always fit in and conform to other ideas of how you should look and act. Please tell your child to be who they choose to be. Don't judge them for who they are on the inside and out. There have been way too many tragedies due to the fact that a child felt they could not be who they knew they were. Too many children hide their true self to prevent being bullied or harassed. Stop the cycle now. If your child wants to wear bright colors or dye their hair let them...is that the worst thing in the world? If your child comes to you and loves you enough to confide in you they are attracted to the same sex....don't shut them out. You may push them away for the last time. Quit being so damn judgmental people. This in turn teaches your children to love openly and give all they can. Let's raise a generation of loving and caring people!

Geez...just relax! Okay easier said than done. I know this because I fight this everyday. I am a work in progress and this is a step toward saving a few years of my life. Stress will kill you. It isn't a joke and it needs to be addressed. I know we can't stop worrying all together. We are humans and humans are born to worry. Worry will be one partner on your journey through life however this is a partner that you want to throw off the train as much as possible. Honestly when you start worrying just sit back and breathe. Take a few minutes to think about it. Ask yourself "is this something that I can change?" "Is this going to harm me or kill me?" "Is there a way to fix it without stressing so much?" If it is something you can not do anything about then drop it. Don't let it eat away at you or chip away the pieces of happiness in your life. It may be hard to do but take at least 10 minutes a day for yourself. You need quiet self time to reboot. Even if it is bath time...light a candle, read a book, meditate, or just soak up that warm water and relax. Make the spouse or older children watch the children...don't say you can't because you CAN.

Take time each day to make a tiny list of things you are grateful for and cherish. We as humans are so inclined to take things for granted. Don't do it. What if you woke up tomorrow and those small things were gone..would you miss them? Notice the small things in life everyday. While you are driving look at the scenery. Notice the flowers or the small animals that live life so freely. When you get home wrap those arms around your babies or your spouse. Feel the love. Call an old friend that you just haven't had "time" for. Set up a girls night out. Call your parents if you are lucky enough to still have them around. When you clock in at work as much as you hate it..try to at least smile and tell yourself that there are those that do not have a job to go to. When you sit down for dinner be grateful you have food to put in your mouth..remember there are so many out there tonight that are picking their food out of a garbage can. Seriously, it may not sound like a lot but finding things to be grateful for will make you happier and make you appreciate your life so much more.

Don't be boring...raise some hell. Isn't life about taking risks? You have no idea just how short life is. You only get one go round and no double takes. Have some damn fun for the love of Buddah. Who cares what other people think? It is time that we quit worrying about what someone will say if we have a drink or if we get a tattoo. Who cares! That is my new motto. My tattoos do not mean I am a bad person or I am "trashy". If you want to do something go do it. Now, I'm not saying go out and rob a bank or do something completely illegal but do go out and do something that may be viewed as risky. Enjoy that thrill. Go do karaoke even if you can't carry a tune in a bucket! Go sky diving even if you are terrified of heights. Go have a one night stand...but use protection please! Geez live out loud!

Be completely open with your sexual self. Be intimate and enjoy it. Drop those inhibitions that keep you from feeling the ecstasy that you are entitled to. Share yourself completely with your mate. Don't be afraid to try and experience new things with each other. Sex is a bonding experience and it is completely NORMAL. Don't let anyone make you feel bad for enjoying sex and making love. Buy videos or books and take it to the next level. Just do not miss out on the happiness and bliss that true intimacy can bring you. I think that due to my past and things that happened to me I didn't enjoy sex the way it was meant to enjoy. I think I used it as a way to "make" men love them and that just didn't work. Sex can't make anyone love you. However when you truly love someone it can make sex completely amazing. Try it!

Practice kindness! This one should not be hard. Be nice to those you meet. Talk to strangers. Buy someone lunch. Open the door for the person behind you. Let someone cut line just because. There are so many random acts of kindness that can be carried out...simple little acts that will make someones day. I believe you get what you give. Don't miss a chance to make someone smile because you never know what kind of battle they are facing. When I was sitting with my mom in the hospital in Nashville for those three months the days and nights became one. I was so alone and felt empty. I had a friend who would always send me texts first thing in the morning and last thing at night....words of kindness. These texts made my days and nights easier. He put a smile on my face even through the tears.

LOVE YOUR FAMILY. Your children and your spouse are your heartbeat. At least mine are. Don't waste a minute on fighting and feuding. Love them with your whole heart and do not take them for granted. I used to worry about how clean my house was and what all had to be done. I wasted so much time that could have been spent playing with my babies. Those cobwebs will still be there tomorrow. That load of laundry can sit and pile up, the dishes are in no hurry to get clean, and the beds do not HAVE to be made...I mean we are going to climb right back in them. However, your babies are growing up..you can't stop time. They are crawling around your feet one day and walking out the door to go to college the next. Hold them, play with them, cuddle them, read to them, play games with them, listen to them no matter how busy you are. They will be gone one day...don't waste what precious time you have with them. Well that wraps it up for the day....just a few thoughts of a mad mommy. I hope you do take these to heart though. Just try it out and let me know what you think. I hope all you have a wonderful day! Big hugs and kisses!!! xxooxxoo